[miclo18d]

I'll also throw in my .02¢ with a different perspective.

My EXWIFE was fully on board with SF and supported me. Until she didn't. No warning, left me right before an A-Stan deployment, took the kids, and went and shacked up in a different state with some dude. (Ultimately I'm better off for it but it hurt at the time.)

I'll try to throw some caveats in here:
1. You have been living with this woman for 11 years and are having a 2nd child with here and you don't have the cajones to pull the trigger and marry her? WTFO?

2. I have seen many times wives give the ultimatum to get out of a certain unit because the unit is destroying the marriage. They get out of the unit and the wife leaves them anyway. Point: it wasn't the unit, it was the marriage.

3. My wife told me this about how men and women interact: "When a man says no, it means NO. When a woman says no, it's the beginning of negotiations." If you love her and want it to stay that way, don't join. She has already given you a NO. Even if you convince her to change her mind, it will come back to what she wants and then... See the first part of my post.

4. Figure out who's being selfish here. If you, just forget this nonsense. If her, maybe you'd be better of on your own. Remember that you have kids with her and that's a big responsibility. One that I don't take lightly. I ended up driving 12 hours to go "liberate" my kids from the ex while in ACAP. I was lucky to be retiring, that I could keep them with me without having to jump through a thousand hoops that the military makes you do to be a single parent! That said divorce lawyers, child support, visits, using the kids against each other.... Is it worth jumping out of an airplane?


There is a lot of good advice and experience in this thread, take heed to all of it!