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I mean no offense to anyone, and mean no disrespect, but how is "Pineland" news?
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If you manage to stay around long enough and experience enough of life, you'll discover that life - and news - is cyclical. Read a bit of History and you'll be amazed at what isn't new - or news. 
Richard's $.02 
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“Sometimes the Bible in the hand of one man is worse than a whisky bottle in the hand of (another)… There are just some kind of men who – who’re so busy worrying about the next world they’ve never learned to live in this one, and you can look down the street and see the results.” - To Kill A Mockingbird (Atticus Finch)
“Almost any sect, cult, or religion will legislate its creed into law if it acquires the political power to do so.” - Robert Heinlein
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