Professional Soldiers ® - Airsoft the Greek Philosophizer

All right fuckers…
…time for another installment of metaphoric wisdom
…time for another tale from Airsoft the Greek Philosophizer
…it’s story time with Uncle Box

Airsoft the Greek Philosophizer provides timeless lessons through allegory and shared human experiences. One such tale examines modern day America and our current conflict with Iran. Some of you may find it similar to the tale of "The Farmer and the Viper."

Once upon a time, there was a Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist and a hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran…
…the Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist suffered from severe mental illness and was apologetic of, and possibly even suffering from, several different types of what I’ll just refer to as “social dysphoria”

One day, the Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist was wandering through a frozen apocalyptic snow covered hell scape that had been ravaged by unchecked ab hominibus global warming. The Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist’s hair seemed to glow from the numerous pastel colored shades of blue, pink, green, and purple in (they/them/their) hair. The stainless-steel nose, lip, eyebrow, ear cartilage, and septum rings from the Piercing Pagoda were gleaming in the noon day sun as (they/them/their) walked cautiously across the tundra, frozen solid by global warming.

As the Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist choked on the fresh air, gasping for a reality soothing breath of freshly burned cannabis sativa leaves, when (they/them/their) stumbled upon a wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran, nearly frozen to death from the accumulation of fluffy white global warming. The hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran admittedly had close ties to Hezbollah, the Houthis, Palestinian Islamic Jihad, Hamas, the Al Ashtar Brigades, Saraya al Mukhtar, and even 23-year-old Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, (the Nigerian national that tried to detonate his underpants on a flight from Amsterdam to Detroit) but none of that mattered. What mattered was that the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran, absolutely hated America, and more importantly, the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran hated Donald Trump. The Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist just barely heard the muffled anti-American rhetoric from the nearly frozen wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran cried out with a dying breath…

“Help me, comrade! We both hate the same oppressors!”

The Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist, blinded by the warm glow of shared grievances, and a generally misguided hatred of civilized western society, joyously replied...

“Well, who cares if you’re filled with toxic rage and unfounded hatred of innocent people that reject your violent radical religious practices, you hate capitalism and Donald Trump and that’s all that matters in a world that demands peace, love, and tolerance !!!”

The Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist gleefully rescued the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran. They/Them/Their, took him home, wrapped him in a warm blanket of solidarity, and even fixed him a nice warm mug full of fair-trade coffee with a splash of plant based non-dairy creamer.

The wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran eased into his surroundings and began to observe the Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist’s daily rituals. His first instinct was to treat the Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist like an Afghani would treat a Bacha Bazi, but something was…

…off

Was it the numerous shades of pastel colored hair?
Was it the stainless-steel nose, lip, eyebrow, ear cartilage, and septum rings scattered across they/them/their face?
Was it just the irritating, self righteous, indignant, smug, holier than thou, know it all, condescending attitude?
Who can tell…

Regardless, the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran absorbed the Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist’s progressive ideals like a predator sizing up its next meal.
“What in the actual fuck is it that I hate so much about this Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist’s progressive ideals?” Thought the Iranian…

Is it their bizarre obsession with gender equality?
Is it some illogical dedication to the concept of LGBTQ+ rights?
Secularism?
Global Warming?
Rights for the criminal?

"I don’t have time to worry about all that,” hissed the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran. “I’ll deal with those pesky details later. For now, let’s just focus on dismantling their system!”

And so, the Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist and the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran formed their unlikely alliance and began marching side by side against imperialism, oppression, and the evils of the West. The Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist proudly blasted capitalism by using they/them/their 1100 dollar iPhone 17 Pro, to post countless selfies with the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran on they/them/their social media site, captioning them with hashtags like #Solidarity and #IntersectionalRevolution.

Meanwhile, the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien was no longer frozen in two feet of frozen fluffy white global warming. He was warm, and healthy, and had a belly full of Hickory Smoked Bacon and Iberico Pork. The wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien began quietly sharpening his fangs and preparing for his next violent terrorist act against the infidels; waiting for the perfect moment to strike.

Then came the inevitable conclusion to our story; the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran struck – and he struck with a horrid level of unbelievable violence. Not only did the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran strike, he struck the Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist hardest of all.
In an act of finality, 17 stories into the New York City Skyline, he ceremoniously defenestrated the naive, ignorant, irritating, self righteous, indignant, smug, holier than thou, know it all, condescending Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist…

As the naive, ignorant, irritating, self righteous, indignant, smug, holier than thou, know it all, condescending Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist fell 17 stories to they/them/their death, they/them/their cried out in disbelief…

“But, whyyyy?!”

The wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran simply shrugged and replied,
“You knew who I was when you pulled me from beneath the fluffy white frozen global warming.”
…and then the overweight rainbow haired Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist slammed into the concrete pavement at 85 miles an hour and came apart like a tomato being hit with an aluminum softball bat.

So...
...what is the moral of this story, you might ask ???

Well, the absurdity of these unholy alliances that we see in our American politicians, celebrities, wealthy elites, and even the rank and file fan of “The View” is almost Shakespearean in its tragic irony. Left-wing activists, who champion progressive values, consistently invite these venomous ideologies into their homes – blindly believing that they wont get bit.

It’s like throwing a dinner party - inviting a grizzly bear - and then acting surprised when it eats one of your friends. Sure, you both hate the same hunters, but that doesn’t mean the bear won’t maul you once the ocean caught, organicly sourced, ethicly prepared salmon filets run out.

Let’s not forget the wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran and HIS perspective in all this mess. From their point of view, American leftists are nothing more than useful idiots. A temporary ally that will help achieve some nefarious goal before being discarded (or devoured). In many cases, the “predator” has less respect for these fair weather friends than they do for mainstream western society...
...at least main stream society has a consistent ethos.

The wayward hate filled Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran doesn’t care about the lefts values; it cares about survival and dominance through violence. They don't care about democracy. They care about the installment of Sharia Law. They are NOT here in America to join a revolution (not in their role as a big city Mayor and not in their role as swindlers overrunning the entire state of Minnesota) they are here to hijack it and destroy it.

These assholes on “the left” all think that it’s fun to chant "anti-the-current-thing" slogans together while using a human wave to block traffic, but they are too fucking stoo-stoo-stooopid to posses the foresight needed to realize that they are going to wake up one day to find that their edgy new ally has turned their progressive utopia into a dystopian nightmare.

So, in closing, the next time a Radical Left Wing Liberal Democrat Activist is tempted to form an alliance with Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal alien from Iran that fundamentally opposes everything you stand for, just remember: solidarity is great, but survival is better.
And Ultra-Radical Islamo-Fascist illegal aliens from Iran? Well, they’re not known for their loyalty.

…cleared hot from the IP